Invisible act of Power-Caroline Myss

19th April

I have been reading a book by my favourite spiritual author: Caroline Myss - Invisible act of power. As always another good book... And I think I will be writing about things I have read in it... So first one: "People in the middle years, especially, seek out meaning. Carl Jung described maturity as an awakening to the need to live a life of spiritual purpose rather than simply fulfilling the basic needs of physical survival or pursuing pleasure. He saw each person as the hero of his or her own life's journey who sets out on a path to greater spiritual awareness." 

Ok so is this what middle life crisis is? At many levels, I believe it is! Most of us live life and create a comfortable life for us and our family because we feel this is what is expected of us! By our family- parents and society. To grow up with inbred expectations and beliefs. Some were real and some were only our interpretation of them. And this is a big point in human beings life! We choose what to feel or believe something means! Mostly unconsciously but never the less we do need to take responsibly of this one day! 

Have you question about how two siblings have so different ideas of their parents' ways of discipline, for example? How the same trauma experienced by a group of people have so different consequences in them. The way they reacted at the time or how it affected them afterwards? That is because we all unique and we experience things differently! So the same action, let's say: 'you can never do anything!' by a parent can make the child feel insecure, unloved, unwanted and a failure who will grow up to be always a nobody with low self-esteem and feeling like he can never do anything well enough and therefore he is a waste of space. Ok, I am pushing here but I want to make a point :) 

The brother was told exactly the same thing and became angry, and rebellious and hated his parents and went on pretending he didn't care... He made a life for himself and carry on, today he still doesn't talk to his parents and in fact, even though he has a good job and even a family he is never happy and has become a bully just like he was in school. 

But there is another brother! This one didn't get angry or allowed himself to be a nobody, he is the pride of his parents but he doesn't know it! He carried on life doing always his very, very best! The best at school, the best husband, the best son, the best father now... He does everything so well, with so much care... Waiting and waiting for his parents' approval, but even though deep inside they are proud they never thought of telling him! Why should they? He is a grown man with a fantastic job, sure he doesn't need mum to say ' well done! I am so proud of you! ' But guess what he does! They all do! We all do.

Until one day they stop pretending, they have a crisis. Their body will be saying: stop pretending! Stop doing all this for someone else! Stop thinking those things about yourself! Depression comes in, middle life crisis come in... With luck and good help, they all will learn about themselves and why they are like that and they will reconnect with their true selves and begin a new life. A life where they will not need anymore the approval of the parents for they have their own approval. They will be proud of themselves and love themselves for who they are. They will be free! X